Total Drama World Tour Redux
by AshleyMaxnGary
Summary: Yet another my-way season rewrites! Not too different at first, but big changes later on. Almost every elimination is different, as well.


This chapter of Total Drama World Tour contains scenes of extreme stunts performed by fictional teens. Do not try any of what you see here at home. Seriously, you could get really messed up.

* * *

(Runway somewhere in Toronto, Canada)

"Season three of Total Drama, folks!" Chris McLean announced, beaming broadly at the camera, "The world is gonna be mine, sea to shining sea. Sadly," he continued as an old, beat up bus arrived on the runway behind him, "I'm forced to share my world with a three ring travelling teen freak show. They'll be competing all around the globe for another million dollars."

"So… let's meet our players!" He announced as a Hispanic girl with shoulder length chestnut hair stepped off the bus, waving elegantly to the camera. Behind her, a teen with a green mohawk and multiple piercings leered at her behind, carrying one bag over his shoulder, and another in his hands. Following behind the couple were three girls, one an Asian with raven hair in a short ponytail, waving cheerfully at the camera, another being a pale Goth girl with a variety of green shades throughout her hair, and the final girl being a voluptuous African-Canadian beauty.

Beaming at the audience as the first arrivals approached him, Chris McLean introduced them as "Courtney! Duncan… Heather… Gwen… and LeShawna!"

Heather came to a stop, gazing around her at the abandoned runway with a look of disgust, before someone ran into the back of her.

"Ugh!" Both girls, Heather and the Goth, grunted at the same time.

"Are there reserved seats?" Gwen growled, thrusting a finger angrily at Heather, "i.e. Can I have one not behind Heather's pony hair ponytail?"

Turning around, raising her hair indignantly into the air, Heather retorted, "Um, my extensions are _human_ hair."

"You learn something new every day," Duncan interjected, smirking as Heather rolled her eyes and Gwen chuckled.

Duncan caught Gwen's eye, smiling seductively, resulting in the Goth girl's blushing. This was something that Courtney did not miss, sneering at Gwen.

"Excuse me, Gwen," she smiled politely, "have you spoken to Trent lately? It's such a shame you two didn't work out, you were _so_ cute together."

The moment was instantly ruined, with Gwen awkwardly looking away as Duncan wrapped an arm around Courtney's waist, gently pecking her cheek. Satisfied, Courtney pressed herself into Duncan's side.

"Excuse me, can we get this show on the road?" LeShawna called to Chris, placing a hand on her wide hip, "I'd like to get out of the cold sometime _today_."

"Of course, LeShawna," Chris uncharacteristically smiled, "here we have… Lindsay!"

"Hi, Chip!" The blonde bombshell beamed, before blowing a kiss to the camera.

"Owen, DJ, and… Harold!" Chris announced, the response being a couple of grunts and a cry of panic. "Guys…?" The host called out nervously.

"Sweet strawberry preserves! No!" An overweight blonde boy cried, being carried off the bus by a muscular Jamaican-Canadian teen.

"He's afraid of flying, remember?" DJ explained, before carrying him off the bus.

"Aerophobia," a red headed teen was wheezing, following close behind, "from the Latin. As opposed to Aeronauseophobia, a fear of air sickness." Pleased with himself, Harold made his way over to the other contestants, pushing his thick glasses up the brim of his nose.

"Wooow," a short pudgy girl with equally thick glasses gasped in awe. "That ith tho fathinating, Harold." She had to run behind him to keep up, her legs considerably shorter than his.

Following close behind was a tall boy with bright green eyes and glossy black hair. He stood next to Gwen, the two awkwardly making eye contact as he murmured a "hello."

"Beth, Trent, and… Justin!" The host grinned, making hand gestures towards the bus as the final teen announced made their way off the bus.

The teen in question was drop dead gorgeous. His skin was perfectly tanned from both tanning booths, because, eww, sun tanning gives you wrinkled, and his Hawaiian heritage. His dark hair was shaggy and healthy, shining beautifully. And his muscles… Every girl on the runway, even Owen, swooned.

"Ladies," Justin smirked seductively, stalking towards the group with model's grace.

"Also returning this season," Chris announced, "you're Total Drama Aftermath Co-Hosts, Bridgette and…. Geoff!"

The blonde surfer and party animal duo unceremoniously made their way off the bus, caught in a passionate embrace. The couple, sucking face, didn't even notice they were off the bus until a number of contestants cleared their throats, causing them to blush furiously.

"H-hey," Bridgette stammered, gazing down at her feet.

"Yo, Chris," Geoff called out, loud and unashamed, "where's the plane at?"

"I know, right?" A familiar red-headed girl gushed, eyes darting around wildly, as though she'd consumed too much sugar that morning, "Let's fly!" With a cry, she leaped into the air, landing on Geoff's shoulders, "Woooo!"

"Hey, watch out!" Geoff cried as he fell onto Bridgette, the three sprawling across the runway in a heap.

"That's right," the host smirked, Izzy's back! Along with Noah, Cody, and… Ezekiel!"

The first returning contestant announced, a dark-haired Inuit boy with an incredibly high IQ, sighed as he stepped on the three contestants, walking over them. "Oh, boy," Noah cheered with mock-enthusiasm, "I sure am glad to be back for another season after how much fun I had the first time."

"Oh, cheer up, Noah!" Cody, a short boy with a brown mop for hair and a cute gap between his front teeth, followed close behind, hopping over the three contestants on the ground. "At least you're here with your friends, right?"

"Oh, yes," Noah sarcastically replied, "all of my wonderful friends who unanimously voted me off."

Giving up, Cody sighed, walking over to stand closer to Gwen.

"Yo, yo, yo!" A thick accented voice called, "this year's winner is in the house! Er… bus…" Ezekiel smiled sheepishly, his green toque almost covering his eyes, as he stepped off of the bus, "Er… I mean, runway!" Realising that nobody had paid him any attention, he turned a deep scarlet and scurried over to the rest of the contestants.

"Time to meet our final four returning contestants," the host announced, with a hint of relief in his voice as he neared the end of the introductions. "Everyone please give a round of applause for Katie, Sadie, Eva, and… Tyler!"

"Oh my gosh," an overweight girl wearing pigtails gushed to her friend, who was dressed exactly the same. "Katie, look, a runway!"

"Okay, I have always wanted to go travelling!" Katie, a thinner, tanned girl, gushed in reply, before both girls squeed, dashing over to the other contestants.

Following close behind was a fairly short, incredibly muscular girl wearing a dark blue exercise outfit. In each hand she carried a bag, presumably with weights in each one. Plastered over her face was a scowl as she deliberately stomped on the three contestants on the ground.

Tyler, a muscular boy wearing a red jumpsuit, with a matching sweatband over his shaggy brown hair, posed at the bottom of the stairs. Attempting to show off his athleticism, he flexed his arms, before tripping and adding to the pile of contestants on the asphalt.

"And now to mix things up and keep it all fresh," Chris grinned sinisterly, "we're adding two new competitors!" Speaking as if her were under the spell of a beautiful woman, Chris introduced the first new teen, "He's an honour roll student with a diplomat for a dad, and an amazing ability to charm the pants off most species… Alejandro!"

The Latin teen smiled wickedly as he made his way off the bus, his pectorals threatening to rip his shirt open, even with all of the buttons over the chest being unbuttoned. Removing his sunglasses, he bent down to help Bridgette and Izzy to their feet, "Perhaps I can assist?"

"Wowee," Izzy swooned as both girls blushed and giggled.

"I-I-I have a boyfriend!" Bridgette stammered, looking down at Geoff desperately.

"And amigos, please, allow me," Alejandro smiled, helping Geoff and Tyler up as well.

"Wow, man," Geoff grinned, scratching the back of his head.

"I-I-I like girls!" Tyler cried, fighting at the blush that threatened to burn to the surface.

"And she's a sugar addicted super fan, with over 100 Total Drama fan blogs!," Chris finished, with a sigh of relief, "… Sierra!"

Running from the very back of the bus onto the runway, the tanned girl with long, violet hair, gasped in awe of the 22 original Total Drama Island contestants before her. "Oh my gosh, I love you guys!" She cried, clutching over her heart with both hands, "This is the greatest day of my life, and…" She suddenly began hyperventilating, both laughing and gasping for breath at once. "Anybody got a paper bag I can breathe into?"

Noticing one contestant in particular, she rushed over to him, squealing in delight, "Oh my gosh, Cody! I've dreamt of this moment, only…" she smiled darkly, "you weren't wearing a shirt."

At that moment, a large, run-down jet that look as though it would fall apart at any time rolled its way onto the runway. A large plume of smoke was released from one of the turbines, and a large image of Chris was plastered on the side of the vehicle.

"What the-?" Duncan breathed, Lindsay tilting her head to the side in confusion.

"Excuse me," Courtney called as a screw fell loose, "but I'd like to express some concern about the safety of our plane."

"Relax," the charming host reassured, "it's perfectly safe." As he said this, a panel fell off the side of the jet, a raccoon and rat scurrying from the inside of the jet. "Now boarding!" Chris announced, nonchalantly.

"No!" Owen cried, waving his hands about in fear, "I can't ride in that! Call the united nations! Call a cab! Call my mum! No, I'm not doing this! I'm out, this is unethical!"

Any more complaints Owen, or any of the other contestants may have had, were silenced when Chris knocked Owen unconscious with a large frying pan.

"Anyone else have any complaints?" Chris scowled.

"Nope," Cody chuckled nervously.

"Love it!" Katie gushed.

"Totally!" Sadie agreed with her BFFFL.

"Dibs on the window seat!" Bridgette smiled cautiously, holding onto Geoff.

"Now boarding," the host continued from where he'd oh so rudely been interrupted, "one voyage to a million dollars!" Turning to the camera, he pointed his fingers as if they were a gun, "We're saving you a first class seat for all the action! Right here, on… Total! Drama! World Tour!"

"Seriously?" Duncan scoffed.

* * *

(Dining Area – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"Singing?" Gwen asked as she and the rest of the contestants followed Chris into what appeared to be the 'cafeteria' of the jet. "Really? I thought Chris was joking about that."

"Well, I don't have a problem with it," Courtney smiled sweetly.

"Yeah," LeShawna drawled, "'coz you _like_ singing."

"Well I don't!" Duncan growled, "Girls sing. Little birdies sing. Duncan's do not sing!"

"Think I'll get to beatbox?" Harold was excitedly saying to LeShawna.

"I'll beat you if you try!" Duncan snapped, shaking his fist at the gangly nerd.

Heather stepped forward, thrusting a finger angrily at Chris, "Why are you doing this to us?"

Chris, who had remained silent throughout all the complaints, began to explain, "Singing reality shows are huge. And, the worse the singing, the higher the ratings, which is why on this show, there will be no vocal coaches, or rehearsals, or warning!"

As all the contestants either gasped in horror, or began to angrily complain, the host grinned in triumph. "Anyhoo, this is the dining area, where you'll enjoy inflight meals."

"Not for long, eh?" Ezekiel smiled wickedly, "Prepare to lose to the Zeke!"

As many contestants snickered, Gwen sighed, taking pity on the home-schooled boy. "Okay, so not trying to be mean here, but…" She placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, "You do realise you got voted off first last time you competed… right?"

"Word," the prairie boy replied, "and I've spent every moment since then making sure that don't happen again. I'm stronger, faster, smarter…"

"Chattier? Blabbier? Can't shut up-ier?" Chris snapped, "Now zip it, and let me finish the tour, so we can get this bird in flight!"

Desperate to take the attention off Ezekiel, and ease the tension, LeShawna rose her hand, "Is there a ladies room?"

"Just through there," the host chuckled, pointing behind him.

"Good!" LeShawna smiled confidently, "'Coz I gotta make a deposit."

* * *

**(BATHROOM CONFESSIONAL)**

**LeShawna**: *goes to unbutton her pants, before realising the camera* There's a camera in the potty? _Again_! Ugh! Can't a sistah get a little privacy on this program?

* * *

(Economy Class – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"Losing teams will enjoy luxurious economy class accommodations between destinations," Chris was explaining in the economy class section of the jet. It was cold, with rusted steel walls and floors, with a leak dripping from the ceiling, and two wooden benches along opposite walls of the compartment.

"Okay," Lindsay nodded, looking around, "but where are our beds?"

"Owen, care to demonstrate?" Chris asked with a snicker, bringing everyone's attention to Owen, who was strapped onto one of the wooden benches, a pile of drool forming underneath his sleeping figure.

"Plane, no!" He cried in his sleep.

"That… is disgusting," Heather scoffed with disgust, cringing away from the overweight blonde.

"And not to mention uncomfortable!" Justin contributed with a whine, "Oh, I'm losing beauty sleep just thinking about it!"

"No comfort for losers!" The host smiled, "Only safety harnesses and an emergency exit," he then began moving his fingers as though he were explaining evacuation procedures on a plane before take-off, "but no comfort here, here, or here."

While the other contestants scowled and complained, Sierra burst into laughter, clutching her stomach. "Oh em gee, Chris!" She howled, "I am just el oh el."

"What's so funny?" Geoff blinked, pushing the top of his cowboy hat up with his thumb. He looked to Bridgette, who simply shrugged, before shrugging himself.

"We should hit the winner's compartment, eh," Ezekiel suggested with a grin. "'Coz I ain't never gonna sit back here. Never!"

Plugging his nose, Noah scowled at the home-schooled boy, "Is 'never' your policy on mouthwash too home-school?"

Blushing, Ezekiel shut up, looking down.

"Hey, ignore Noah," Trent smiled, "he's just in a bad mood because he's stuck here without all his books." This last comment received a small smile from Ezekiel, who nodded.

* * *

(First Class – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"This, is the first class cabin!" Chris grinned, "The domain of each destination's winners."

The first class cabin was much nicer than the economy class, with plush seats, immaculate walls and ceiling, carpeted floors, and a bar.

"Now this is a kind of accommodation that ladies deserve," Alejandro smirked at Lindsay, Katie, and Sadie, causing the two BFFFLs to blush.

"They get ladies in first class too?" Lindsay gasped, shocked, before realising what Alejandro had meant, "Oh. Me! You meant me!"

"That guy is as smooth as mama's gravy," DJ observed as Tyler hunched over, depressed.

"Lindsay is meant to like me," Tyler frowned.

This received a good natured chuckle from DJ, "Nobody can compete with gravy."

Getting an idea, Tyler cupped his hands over his mouth, "Hey Lindsay, I can do a handspring!" His following efforts resulting in him lying in a heap at Alejandro's feet.

"Oh my gosh!" Katie and Sadie gasped, along with Lindsay.

"Poor…" Lindsay stopped, unable to recall the jock's name, "I-I'm blanking on his name. Oh, I know, Alejandro!"

"Actually, Lindsay," Sadie began, "it's-"

"That's my name, Lindsay," Alejandro smiled softly, cutting off Sadie, earning himself a cold glare from the two BFFFLs.

"And what a nice name," Lindsay swooned, "Alejandro. I could say it all day."

"Please do," the Latin hunk replied seductively, causing Lindsay to burst into a fit of giggles.

A few seats away, Heather narrowed his eyes.

* * *

**(COCKPIT CONFESSIONAL)**

**Heather: ***with Chef in the background* I can see right through that guy. *looks around* You know, this extra confessional is a thousand times nicer than talking in the toilet.

**Chef: **Maybe for you, I'm tryin' tah prep for a flight here!

**Heather: **Hello, venting? Shhh! Anyway, new guy is so transparent, so fake, so-

**Chef: **Deliciously seductive?

**Heather:** That is exactly the opposite of what I was trying to say!

**Chef:** Pretty good lookin' guy tah boot.

**Heather:** *stares*

**Chef:** I'm just sayin'.

**Heather:** Ugh, forget this!

**Justin:** *filing his nails, with Chef in the background* Okay, I can see _right_ through that guy. *looks around* You know, this extra confessional is much more fitting to my standards than talking in the bathroom. Too bad this jet doesn't have a make-up trailer confessional, that was just great.

**Chef:** Sorry to break it to ya, but Heather was just in here and was sayin' the exact-

**Justin:** Chef Hatchet, please, I'm trying to vent here. Anyway, as I was saying, this new guy is so trans… so trans… ugh, he's just fake, okay! I mean, really, trying to flirt with all the girls to get them on your side? I knew I should have got that copyrighted.

* * *

(Chris's Bedroom Compartment – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"Woah," Cody gasped in awe at the room around him, in which everything was gold-plated. "Where are we now? A grand piano? Wood-burning pizza oven? Four person hot tub with LED light show and dancing waters?"

"How do I win this?" Harold gasped, "My fair LeShawna loves a hot tub."

"Easy tiger," Chris narrowed his eyes, "these are my quarters. And they're off limits! Clear?"

"Crystal," Harold sighed dejectedly.

"Oh Chris," Sierra giggled, having followed Cody into the room, "I heart your limits."

* * *

**(BATHROOM CONFESSIONAL)**

**Heather:** Anyway, with Beth, Lindsiot, and Ale-whatever looking like a real threat, my only strategic option is to make friends with the new girl. But pretending to like that is gonna be hard… *slams hands down on sink* I do not heart the new girl!

**Justin:** Anyway, with Katie, Sadie, and Lindsay all app… app… looking like they're under Ale-jerk-dro's charm, and there being no way I can pretend to like that pig girl… what was her name… Beth?... again, that leaves me only one option! I need to charm the pants off of the new girl! She shouldn't be that hard to charm, if she has a crush on _Cody_, right?

* * *

(Dining Area – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"And, that's pretty much it," Chris was finishing after a long day of introductions and explaining rules. "I skipped the cargo hold and galley, but I'm sure you'll find those exciting destinations later, when I 'accidentally' lock you in them."

As the jet began taxiing for lift off, Bridgette tripped into Alejandro's lap, earning the Latin hunk a glare from Geoff.

"Woah, senorita, are you alright?" He asked softly in her ear.

"Is the Earth moving?" Bridgette murmured, causing Geoff to gasp in horror.

Luckily, Izzy ruined the moment with an outburst, "Nope, we are! Woooo!"

"One more thing!" Chris cried, earning groans from the twenty four teens, "I'm sure you remember a little something called the elimination ceremony? Takes place, right in there my friends," he pointed to a compartment connected to the dining area.

* * *

(Elimination Ceremony Hall – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

The Elimination Ceremony Hall seemed to be Hawaiian themed, with tropical curtains behind a podium lit up brightly with spotlights. On either side of the door were large tiki idols, with a tropical-patterned carpeted-rug leading from the door to the wooden bleachers.

"If you don't receive a barf-bag full of airline issued peanuts-"

"I got a peanut allergy, eh?" Ezekiel stated, cutting the host off. "Er, more of a sensitivity?"

Furrowing his brow, the host attempted to continue, "You will be forced to take the Drop of Shame."

"Okay," Ezekiel admitted awkwardly, "I just don't like them."

"Kinda like this," Chris demonstrated, grabbing the home-schooled boy by his sweater and throwing him from the jet.

"Hey!" The 'eliminated' contestant growled, before letting out a nervous chuckle, "Good one, eh? Now, slow down, and let my bling back in!"

"All eliminations are final, bro!" Chris waved to the teen who was now running after the jet.

Eva, along with Katie and Sadie, joined Chris at the door, roaring, "First one eliminated, again? Ha! Still think boys are better than girls, home-school!"

"Yeah!" Sadie cried, sticking her tongue out at the poor prairie boy.

"Still think boys are better than girls?" Katie copied the jockette, blowing a raspberry.

A glare from Eva quickly silenced the two, who slunk back to the group of remaining contestants.

* * *

(Dining Area – Total Drama Jumbo Jet)

"Every second we're getting closer to adventure," DJ was frowning, "and further from mama…"

"Cody Emmett Jameson Anderson," Sierra was rattling off facts about Cody, "I also happen to know that your birthday is April 1st. You're my very own April fool…"

As Cody chuckled nervously, Courtney was busy chatting with Bridgette, thus failing to notice Gwen and Duncan sitting in the furthest seats possible from her.

"So, you thinking about hooking back up with Trent again now that he seems to have mellowed out?" Duncan was asking, not failing to notice that her body was pressing firmly against his side.

"I dunno…" the Goth sighed, "I didn't even want to break up in the first place. But now that we have, it just doesn't feel the same, you know?"

Glancing over at Courtney, who was laughing with Bridgette at Geoff, who'd stuck peanuts up his nose, Duncan let out a sigh, "I know…"

_~Ding-ding~_

"Whenever you hear that friendly little bell, it's musical number time!" Chris said in a sing-song voice, a spotlight over him as he performed a small dance. "So… let's hear it!"

"But…" Courtney spluttered, "What are we supposed to sing?"

"You have to make it up as you go," the host sneered in a patronising tone, "wouldn't be challenging otherwise, now, would it?"

**Courtney**: Up.

**Courtney and Bridgette: **Up.

**Courtney, Bridgette and Sierra:** Up.

**Courtney, Bridgette, Sierra and Beth:** Up.

**Trent:** Sing.

**Trent and Cody:** Sing.

**Trent, Cody and Geoff:** Sing.

**Trent, Cody, Geoff and Justin:** Sing.

**All girls (except Gwen):** We're flying.

**All boys (except Duncan, Ezekiel and Owen):** And singing.

**All (except Duncan, Ezekiel, Gwen and Owen): **We're flying and singing!

**Sierra:** Come fly with us!

**Sierra and Cody:** Come fly with us!

**Izzy: **We got a lot of crazy tunes to bust, haha!

**Beth: **Come fly with uth!

**Beth and Lindsay: **Come fly with us!

**Alejandro:** It's a pleasure and an honour and a must.

**Beth and Lindsay:** *silently giggle and blush*

**Duncan:** *speaking* Dudes this is messed, you're singing in a plane.

**Harold:** What did you expect? Chris is freaking insane! Guh- *hits himself in the head with a nunchaku*

**Gwen:** *speaking* Yeah, but guys, you're singing on TV!

**Courtney:** Haven't you always wanted to? It can't just be me!

**DJ:** Come fly with us!

**DJ and LeShawna:** Come fly with us!

**Heather:** *speaking* Do you know how to steer this thing?

**Chef:** *speaking* I try.

**Ezekiel:** They thought they could leave me and depart. But this stowaway's got winning in his heart.

**Noah:** Come fly with us! Come die with us!

**Owen:** *speaking* We're flying? I hate flying! Stop the plane!

**Chris:** *knocks Owen out with frying pan*

**All girls (except Gwen):** Come fly with us!

**All boys (except Duncan, Ezekiel and Owen): **Come sing with us!

**Gwen and Duncan:** *speaking* No!

**Chris:** *speaking* Anyone care to be reminded of the season three rules?

**Eva:** This is ridiculous, but-

**Bridgette:** All contestants must sing in each show.

**Courtney:** Duncan do it, let's go!

**Trent:** Gwen, sing it, don't go!

**Gwen:** *speaking* I don't wanna go home…

**Gwen:** Come fly with us! Come fly with us! Come, and fly, with us!

**Courtney:** Come on, Duncan, please?

**Duncan:** This sucks….

**All (except Duncan, Ezekiel and Owen):** Yeah!

"Enough singing, fruitcakes!" Chef growled over the loudspeaker, "Strap yourselves in, we are now beginning our decent into Egypt! Musical numbers," he began grumbling to himself, not realising he could still be heard over the loudspeaker, "worst idea ever. Chris is such an idiot. Hey, why's the PA light still on? Oh shi-"

* * *

(Egypt)

"You guys ready for a little fun?" Chris asked a while later, being carried by interns as he was dressed as a pharaoh. "Wow, it's a scorcher out here," he stated, before taking a long sip of lemonade. "I call today's challenge Pyramid: Over Under!"

"An eleven hour flight," LeShawna growled, "Chef's inflight cuisine, a forced musical number, and _now_ we've got a challenge!"

"Yep," the host smirked, toasting her, "don't you love this game?"

"It's like we're being cooked in a giant oven," Harold wheezed as he and the other contestants stood behind the starting line, sweat dripping down his face.

Pointing to the tin foil on his head, LeShawna drawled, "It might help if you weren't dressed like a giant baked potato."

"Aluminium foil means the aliens can't read your brains," the geek wheezed in explanation. Off her look, he got defensive, "It's a real problem in this area!"

The pair cringed as the host hit two large cymbals together, laughing, "Man, that's satisfying! Alright, Pyramid: Over Under means that you get to choose how you get to the finish line; either over, or under the pyramid. Got it?" Pleased with the contestants' nodding, he raised one hand in the air, "Ready!" The contestants tenses to run. "Set."

"Wait up, yo!" A voice cried, the prairie boy it belonged to skidding to a half before them. "You guys, wait up! I told you I wasn't gonna lose this time, eh?"

"Didn't we leave you in, like, Halifax, or Whitehorse, or whatever?" Chris squinted, confused.

"Toronto," Ezekiel corrected, "and it's called landing gear, homie. I climbed it, and I hid with the cargo."

"Impressive," the host sneered, "but, you're still out."

"No way!" Ezekiel cried, "I'm in it to win it!"

"Chris, no one even voted him off!" Trent scowled, "Just let him compete."

"Word!" Ezekiel nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

"Hey, it's your funeral," Chris rolled his eyes dismissively. "Set… Go!" He clapped the cymbals in Ezekiel's face, causing him to fall over, as the other contestants ran ahead.

* * *

(Under – Pyramid – Cody, DJ, Eva, Ezekiel, Harold, Heather, Izzy, Justin, Katie, LeShawna, Noah, Owen, Sadie, and Sierra)

"No way," Noah sighed, "our friendly neighbourhood host dude failed to mention that there were different paths."

"Hey, Sierra," Heather smiled pleasantly, "which way do you think we should go?"

"Yeah, Sierra," Justin winked, "which way?"

"Me?" The violet haired girl giggled, "Um, ugh, aw…"

"How do we know which way is right?" Owen asked nervously.

"I know!" Izzy gasped, "Okay, I saw this on a spy movie once. You lick your finger, and hold it up to find the air flow!" Licking her finger, she smiled in delight, "Mmm, the sand really crunches in your teeth! Fun! Haha, okay, DJ, give me your hand."

"Don't do it, DJ!" LeShawna warned, "You might catch a case of crazy!" Over her shoulder, she called, "Come on, Harold," and headed down one of the passages, followed by Harold and DJ.

Looking up, Izzy noticed a scarab beetle sign above the passage LeShawna had just gone down, and, looking to its right, began bouncing up and down, "Oooh, oooh, let's take the scary mummy door!"

* * *

(Over – Pyramid – Alejandro, Beth, Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, Geoff, Gwen, Trent, and Tyler)

With the sun glaring down on them, Tyler let out a complaint, "Is it too late to go under instead?"

"Alejandro's doing okay," Lindsay pointed out, the Latin hunk gracefully climbing the pyramid. "He's like, the super cutest mountain goat in the world!"

"Wait!" Tyler cried, stepping in front of his girlfriend, "I can be a goat!"

"May I be off assistance?" Alejandro asked, taking Lindsay's hand.

"N-no, I should probably go with Geoff…" Bridgette stammered, running over to her boyfriend.

"And you?" Unlike Bridgette, Beth accepted Alejandro's offer without a moment's thought.

"Lindsay!" Tyler cried after them, "I'm a goat! Baaa!"

"Rope climbing was the team building challenge when I was a CIT," Courtney was explaining to Duncan, who she tying a rope around. "If Tiffany Prizalluski hadn't been such a lousy partner, I'd have won."

"I always said Tiffany was over rated," Duncan teased.

"Mock all you like, Duncan," Courtney glared, "but my superior ballet skills are going to ensure our victory."

Seemingly not have listened to a word she'd just said, Duncan cried out, "Hey, Gwen! Are you going over too?"

"Working on it!" She huffed back in response.

"I think Gwen could use a hand," Duncan hinted.

Rolling her eyes, Courtney gave in, "Fine. But only because a three person ballet is stronger."

"Hey, Court!" Bridgette waved as she and Geoff made their way over, "Is a five person ballet overkill?"

"Of course not," the Hispanic over achiever smiled at her best friend.

* * *

(Under – Mummy Passage – Eva, Izzy, Noah, and Owen)

"Oooh, look!" Izzy was clapping in delight, pointing to a pile of bandages on the ground, "we're in the nurse's office!"

"It's a pyramid," Noah said slowly, "not a high school."

"I don't think that matters to Izzy," Eva laughed, pointing to the red head.

Izzy was throwing the bandages in the air, laughing, "Costume party! Mummy me!" She ordered as she tossed them to the others.

* * *

(Over – Top – Alejandro, Beth, Lindsay, and Tyler)

"Lindsay!" Tyler was crying, desperately climbing after Alejandro and the girls, who'd just reached the top, "Wait up!" Suddenly, he felt a sharp pain in his hand; looking up, he realised he'd just been bitten by a scorpion, "Ow, my hand!" He cried in pain, falling backwards and down the pyramid.

(Under – Ankh Passage – Heather, Justin, Katie, Sadie, and Sierra)

As Sierra stood on a rigged stone, Heather leaped forwards, knocking Sierra, Katie, Sadie, and Justin to the ground, the five barely avoiding being killed by spears.

"Oops," Sierra giggled, "sorry guys!"

Bottling her anger, Heather forced a smile, "Honest mistake. Could have happened to anybody."

"No it couldn't!" Justin snapped, "She just almost killed us all!"

"She said was sorry," Sadie pointed out, placing her hands on her hips.

"Yeah, like, take a pill," Katie frowned, following her friend's lead.

"You are like, so lucky that you're hot," Sadie continued.

"So lucky," Katie concluded, the pair giving each other a satisfied nod.

* * *

(Over – Halfway – Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, Geoff, and Gwen)

"And your form is appalling," Courtney was criticising Gwen, earning her a harsh glare from both the Goth girl, and Duncan.

"Gee, thanks Courtney," Gwen snapped, "I was just wondering about that!"

"Hey, guys," Bridgette smiled nervously, caught between her two friends' bickering, "could you both maybe… calm down? I mean, just, like, you know… chill the fighting?"

Both girls fell silent for a few moments.

"You know," Courtney eventually smiled innocently, "you're only here because I'm feeling nice today."

"Wow, this is you being nice?" Gwen smiled back just as sweetly, before calling up to Duncan, "My sympathies!"

"Duncan!" Courtney gasped in shock, "Are you hearing this!"

Clenching his jaw, Duncan took out a knife, and began climbing back down the pyramid, cutting the rope as he went, so that eventually, nobody was tied together.

"Duncan!" Courtney cried, "What do you think you're doing?"

"I've had it with your bickering!" As Gwen began to smirk, Duncan turned on her, "Yours too! You're my best friend, and my girlfriend, can't you at least _pretend_ to get along!" And with that, he resumed climbing up the pyramid, alone.

"You know this is all your fault, right?" Both the CIT and Goth said to each other at once, earning a face palm from Bridgette.

* * *

(Under – Scarab Passage – DJ, Harold, and LeShawna)

As the three teens ran down the corridor, DJ came to a halting stop, gazing at four mummified animals standing on a table.

"That's a real dog!" He cried, "Poor little guy…"

"DJ," LeShawna huffed, trying to catch her breath, "we do not have time to cry over a stuffed dog!"

"Hey there little buddy," DJ cooed, ignoring LeShawna's complaints. "Wish I had a biscuit to give ya," he smiled, patting the mummified dog. As he touched it, the dog crumbled into dust, triggering a trap. "What'd I do?" He wailed.

"Scarab beetles," Harold cried as the beetles began pouring from the ceiling, "run!"

* * *

(Under – Mummy Passage – Eva, Ezekiel, Noah, and Owen)

"Izzy!" Owen was calling, "Izzy!"

"Dude," Noah sighed, "she's lost. We've gotta go."

"Know-It-All's right," Eva nodded, "I'm not going to lose because Izzy chose now to play hide and seek!"

"Oh, poor Izz…" Owen frowned.

"Poor Izz?" Noah blinked, "She kept insisting we go around in circles because she 'smelled something lucky'."

"Oh, I think that might have been my fault," Owen admitted, giving off a small fart. "Airplane food," he explained, fanning away the stench.

In another section or the passage, Ezekiel was calling out, finding himself increasingly lonely.

"An intercom?" He asked aloud, noticing a small button on the wall beside him. "Yo playas!" He called into it, before realising something was off, "Is this thing on?" Pressing the button, a hole opened up in the ceiling, dropping a pile of dust and bandages on him.

* * *

(Over – Top – Alejandro, Beth, Lindsay, and Tyler)

"It's too steep to carry you down," Alejandro explained apologetically to the girls.

"There mutht be an eathier way," Beth frowned, before noticing the sign beside her. "A thign! If Bridgette were here inthtead of me, she could thurf you down… thorry guyth…"

"I'm a surfer," Alejandro smiled as he pulled the sign free, smiling wickedly as he hit Tyler in the face, sending him falling backwards down the pyramid.

* * *

(Finish Line – Egypt)

Desperate to escape the scarab beetles, LeShawna, DJ and Harold found their way out of the pyramid, making them the first to reach the finish line.

"Good work, guys!" Chris congratulated.

"We're first?" DJ asked, before realising, "We're first!" Cheering, he pulled the others into a hug.

"Go stand behind the number one," Chris instructed.

* * *

(Under – Ankh Passage – Cody, Heather, Izzy, Justin, and Sierra)

Cody, Heather, Justin and Sierra screamed in horror as they ran down the passageway, a bandage-wrapped Izzy following close behind. They'd lost Katie and Sadie sometime during the chase.

"Hey guys," Izzy called after them, "how about another musical number?" With that, she began to sing, "A pyramid is just a triangle, with room inside, I would be awesome, as Frankenstein's bride!"

* * *

(Under – Mummy Passage – Eva, Ezekiel, Noah, Owen)

"Hey brickhouse," Noah was calling, "I found your girl."

"Hey, Izz!" Owen breathed a sigh of relief, before looking at the bandage-wrapped figure seductively, "Say, you do make a cute mummy. Hey, you got a kiss for Ow-"

"MMM!" The bandage-wrapped figure cried in horror, cringing away from the blonde.

Eyes going wide, Eva called to Owen, "Hey chubby, that's not Izzy!"

Catching on, Noah cried, "RUN!"

* * *

(Finish Line – Egypt)

Just as Alejandro prepared to surf, Duncan, Trent, and Geoff reached the top of the pyramid.

"Trent?" Duncan asked, puzzled.

"I climbed up the other side of the pyramid," Trent explained, chuckling.

"Cool," turning his focus to Alejandro, Duncan scowled, "you are not taking that sign, pretty boy."

"Oh, no?" The Latin hunk smiled, "And you would fight me for it, while I'm holding the beautiful Beth and Lindsay?"

"You bet I would," the punk growled, grabbing the hunk, causing him to lose balance.

Falling over the edge, Alejandro made to grab Duncan, instead knocking Geoff over, who then fell into Trent. The resulting mess of teenage bodies falling over the line was… not pretty, to say the least.

The six teens rolled across the finish line, all landing at Chris' feet, who beamed down at them.

As they all got up and headed over to LeShawna, Harold, and DJ, Chris put up a hand, stopping Alejandro. "Not so fast," he smirked, "this season… three teams! Trent, Duncan, Geoff, Beth, and Lindsay round out team one, which means, Alejandro, that you're the first member of team two!"

As Alejandro frowned, Chris placed a hand on his shoulder, "If it's any consolation, you do get…" He motioned to Tyler, who had just tripped and fallen the whole way down the pyramid.

"Uhh…. Tyler, is it?" Alejandro forced a smile.

"Yep," Chris nodded, "and you also get…"

"AAAAARGGGHHH!" Noah, Eva, and Owen screamed as they all ran from the pyramid, arms waving wildly around in the air.

"Congratulations" Chris snickered.

"That's…" The Latin hunk swallowed, hard, "wonderful…"

* * *

**(BATHROOM CONFESSIONAL***

**Alejandro: ***swearing in Spanish*

* * *

Sierra, Cody, Justin, and Heather are the next to exit the pyramid, with Sierra carrying Cody over her shoulder.

"Oh, I am so happy we found you!" Sierra was gushing to Cody. "Heather, aren't you so happy!"

"I'm so happy, I could scream," Heather replied dryly, earning a snicker from Justin.

As they crossed the finish line, Sierra cheered, "Group hug!" Pulling Cody's face into her breasts, "Come on Heath, Jus, you guys too."

Rolling her eyes, Heather reluctantly joined Justin, Sierra and Cody in the group hug.

"Aaaaand, hug's over," Chris announced. "Justin, Sierra, and Cody, you get over there behind the number two. Heather, you start team three."

Looking around, Cody asked, "Where's Gwen?" As Trent glared at him, he quickly added, "Not that I care… Just curious."

* * *

(Over – Top – Bridgette, Courtney, and Gwen)

"I am telling you," Gwen screamed in frustration, "a ballet will not help us down!"

"And I am telling you that it was unsafe to go this far without one!" Courtney fumed, "And _I'm_ in charge!"

"Oh, girls!" Chris smirked through a megaphone, "Remember this sound?"

_~Ding-ding~_

"Glad I'm not them," Duncan chuckled, folding his arms.

Rolling their eyes, the three girls began to sing as they climbed down the pyramid.

**Courtney:** Down.

**Courtney and Bridgette:** Down.

**Courtney, Bridgette and Gwen:** Down. Down.

**Courtney:** Sing.

**Courtney and Bridgette:** Sing.

**Courtney, Bridgette and Gwen:** Sing. Sing.

**Courtney, Bridgette and Gwen:** We're climbing!And singing! We're climbing and we're singing!

**Katie:** Come run with us!

**Katie and Sadie:** Come run with us!

**Izzy:** A pyramid is just a triangle, with lots of room inside. I would be awesome, as Frankenstein's bride!

**Ezekiel:** *speaking* That doesn't even go, eh!

**Courtney, Bridgette and Gwen: **Come climb with us! Come climb with us!

"Hey, we made it!" Bridgette realises, resulting in the three girls cheering as they made their way over to the finish line.

"Looks like we're on the same team," Heather smiled down at them viciously, offering Gwen her hand.

Glaring back at the raven haired girl, Gwen took her hand, and flipped her over so that she was laying on her back. Dusting her hands off, the Goth smiled darkly.

* * *

**(BATHROOM CONFESSIONAL)**

**Bridgette:** After listening to Courtney and Gwen all day, I don't think I can stand being on a team with either one of them! Ugh, why couldn't I be with Geoff on the first team? Or even Alejandro… *blushes* Nope, not him! Just Geoff! Or, any team that doesn't have _Heather_.

* * *

"Izzy, no!" Owen shrieked, covering his eyes as the red head ran out of the pyramid carrying the mummy he'd ran from earlier.

"Drop it, Izzy!" Eva roared, "Drop that… that THING right now!"

"You're carrying the undead!" Noah cried.

"Cool!" Izzy grinned, skidding to a stop, "Bite me so that I can be your undead friend, like Frankenstein!"

Suddenly, something slammed into the back of her, causing her to drop the mummy.

"Oops," Katie smiled apologetically.

"Sorry, Izzy," Sadie frowned. "We were just so frightened!"

"Yeah, totally, we thought we were lost… _again_!" Katie pulled a face of absolute horror at the thought.

"Thanks for all the help, ya knobs!" Ezekiel scowled, ripping the bandages off of his face.

Rolling his eyes, Chris thrust a thumb over his shoulder, "Izzy, Ezekiel, Katie and Sadie, go join team three." Now that the members of each team was settled, the host decided he could continue, "Okay teams, talk amongst yourselves to settle on a team name. You have three minutes, while I enjoy this ice cream cone."

"Team Victory!" Beth, DJ, Duncan, Geoff, Harold, LeShawna, Lindsay, Trent all cried out in unison.

"Team Amazon!" Bridgette, Courtney, Ezekiel, Gwen, Heather, Izzy, Katie and Sadie all cheered, Courtney accidentally kicking Ezekiel in the kiwis.

As her team struggled to even think of a name, let alone agree on one, Sierra cried out in glee, "How about, Team Chris is Really Really Really Really Hot!"

While her team mates all argued, hating the name, Chris loved it, "Alright! Best team name ever, and here are your rewards! Team Amazon, you win a camel."

As the rest of the team looked puzzled, or prepared to argue or complain, Izzy began clapping in delight.

"Team Chris is Really Really Really Really Really Hot, you win a goat!"

"Um, Chris, I believe there were only four…" Alejandro pointed out, but was instantly silenced, as the goat charged at Tyler, knocking him from his feet.

"And Team Victory, here you go!" The host smirked, lifting up a forked stick.

"So, the guys who came in last get a camel, and we get a stick!" LeShawna demanded.

"All will be explained," Chris reassured, "if I feel like it, next time! Right here, on Total! Drama! World Tour!"


End file.
